A Final Rejection Letter

“Applicants who have not been notified of admission or placement on the waitlist by April 2, 2013 should assume they will not be offered admission for 2013-2014. Because of the high number of applications and limited staff, it is not possible to send out denial notifications until late spring. Applicants who wish to confirm their application status sooner, may contact the Programs in Writing after April 16, 2013.”

-Love UCI Irvine

A lot of people are good enough, and a lot of people are exceptional. However, there are a lot of people in the world, and not enough spaces in elite institutions.

A Great Disappointment

The University of Irvine didn’t bother to send a rejection letter. They just let me and everyone else who appiled to stop waiting around. Our $88.00 dollar application fee wasn’t even worth a standard personal letter of rejection. I wonder how much Universities make from application fees. I also wonder where that money goes. Not back into the students, since they can’t even set up an automated rejection letter that makes it look as if they regarded your application as much as they regarded your fee.

I’d been rejected from Brown, Syracuse, and San Diego, but Irvine was the most insulting. They were the most expensive to apply to and gave the least personalized response. Californians, am I right? I feel, as a Californian, I can make fun of the vanity and superiority complex of the institutions of my home state. were able to send an e-mail rejection.

A Chip on My Shoulder

Anyway… that’s over. I’ve had to ask myself, what now? I had wanted to go to graduate school, but I don’t know if I have the heart to fork out more money when I’m clearly not qualified to go. Honestly, graduate school was just a symbol for me anyway. I symbol of success and escape from the poverty and welfare that I was raised in. It would prove that I was intelligent, that I was not white trash or trailer trash or all the other disparaging words that ended in trash. I had a chip on my shoulder and acceptance into a graduate program was going to remove that chip.

Only, I wasn’t accepted. Maybe if I had the money to apply again, I would have done it, but it was too much money for fees. It felt a bit like getting robbed. Like all these universities had a bridge to sell me.

A Land of Opportunity Elsewhere

Maybe, America wasn’t the land of opportunity, after all. Maybe the land of opportunity was somewhere else. Somewhere beyond the seas, but how could this tailer trash get out there beyond the seas?

I had done it before. I was older now, but not feeling wiser. I was feeling rejected, and a little bit worthless and with a significant amount of money missing from my pocket, but I had left America once, no twice, before, so it was time to find another way out.